In a talk I presented on listening to a company where we were implementing a mentoring program, the issue came up about feelings in the workplace.

About a third of the 60 employees present suggested that feelings didn’t belong in the workplace. However, virtually all of the employees indicated that feelings were present there. This means that the manager who achieves the best performance from their work group may want to learn how to effectively deal with feelings by acknowledging them with empathy.

Management philosophies

Sometimes the best ideas for management philosophies come from books that don’t specifically address management issues.

For example, I read a great book called the “Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die.” Author John Izzo presents the results of interviews from several hundred people regarding happiness.

Izzo’s conclusions were summed up as the five secrets of happiness:

•Live in the Moment

•Leave No Regrets

•Be True to Yourself

•Become Love

•Give More Than You Receive

Not only might these be good philosophies for being happy in this life but when you think about it, each of them provide a good foundation for a personal management platform.

A listening philosophy

Other thoughts relating to good management come in the writings of new age philosopher, favorite Oprah guest and Power of Now writer Eckhart Tolle.

Regarding listening, Tolle suggests that the greatest gift to give someone is to be completely present when listening to them. This is not just keeping your eyes off the ringing phone to see who’s calling or glancing at the “from” column on e-mails. No, that would be too easy.

This also includes not thinking of your response, or what your weekend plans are while listening. This means 100 percent full focus on the other person so you really hear them, sense their body language and really understand the message.

Have you ever tried this? When I’ve been completely in the moment listening, I’ve become aware of the richness of the timbre of the human voice, acutely sensitive to body language and the totality of the message I’m receiving. I’ve also sensed that the speaker senses the complete attention and reacts warmly to that (even if they might not completely understand it). I will suggest, at least for me, that this is very hard to sustain but it’s very worthwhile.

Deadliest Catch

Watching an episode (No Season for Old Men) of this highly touted Discovery Channel Special, an example of management undercutting played out that was painful to watch. Deadliest Catch places two cameras on each of several boats that chronicle crab fishing in the Bering Sea.

The skipper of the Early Dawn had not had success navigating his boat to good fishing grounds. He had a painful phone conversation with the boat’s owner who basically gave him a vote of no confidence. It turns out that the owner received secret calls from several crew members who expressed unfavorable opinions of the skipper. The owner took those views and berated the captain. That’s very tough to take. (Although, at final tally, Early Dawn had caught enough fish for a 21K per deckhand split.)

Inappropriate remarks

The May 2 issue of “Human Resource Executive” cited a survey from International Community Research in Pennsylvania. Of the 546 employed Americans questioned, 42 percent indicated they had heard sexually inappropriate remarks. This was up from 34 percent in 2006. Not a very good trend. We all, especially managers, may want to show heightened sensitivity especially surrounding this troubling area.

Interruptions

The same issue of the magazine, using a survey from The Source Center for Creative Leadership in North Carolina, suggested that 52 percent of 126 senior executives polled get interrupted every 10 to 30 minutes.

I think interruptions are what we’re there for. I always have a plan to get through the day. Interruptions can take focus away from that plan, maybe even sabotage my good intentions entirely. However, I always have that to go back to when the issue is dealt with. That’s what makes good managers. They are responsive no matter what.

Plus, every now and then we can go a few hours without being disturbed. Talk about a gift!

Steve Wyrostek is president of Gentle Ears, Inc., in Des Plaines. Contact him at 847-803-6991 or at steve@gentleears.com.